Funny Vows

I promise to make you coffee in the morning, even when you're being cranky. I promise to always pretend I'm listening when you talk about your favorite show....

I promise to be your professional spider-killer, your jar-opener, and your fellow adventurer. I promise to love you even when you're being a "hangry" version of yourself....

I vow to laugh at your jokes, even the ones that aren't funny. I promise to be the one who knows exactly how you like your steak, and to never judge you for your karaoke choices....

I promise to never make you watch football if you don't want to, and I promise to always share the remote, except when my show is on....

I promise to pause my game when you ask me a question, and to listen to your stories even when I've heard them before....

I promise to share my pizza, even when I'm really hungry. I promise to watch bad movies with you and pretend to like them....

I promise to kill the spiders, open the tight jars, and reach the high shelves, as long as you promise to keep me warm....

I promise to stop fighting over the thermostat, or at least to only change it when you aren't looking. I promise to be your professional spider-remover for life....