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Funny Wedding Vows Examples

Funny Wedding Vows are meaningful promises exchanged during a wedding ceremony. They express love, commitment, and intention, and can be adapted to different styles, beliefs, and personal stories.

Below are carefully selected Funny Wedding Vows examples to inspire your own vows. Each example can be personalized to reflect your relationship, values, and voice.

1

I promise to make you coffee.

I promise to make you coffee in the morning, even when you're being cranky. I promise to always pretend I'm listening when you talk about your favorite show....
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2

I promise to be your professional spider-killer.

I promise to be your professional spider-killer, your jar-opener, and your fellow adventurer. I promise to love you even when you're being a "hangry" version of yourself....
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3

I vow to laugh at your jokes.

I vow to laugh at your jokes, even the ones that aren't funny. I promise to be the one who knows exactly how you like your steak, and to never judge you for your karaoke choices....
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4

I promise to never make you watch football.

I promise to never make you watch football if you don't want to, and I promise to always share the remote, except when my show is on....
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5

I promise to pause my game.

I promise to pause my game when you ask me a question, and to listen to your stories even when I've heard them before....
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6

I promise to share my pizza.

I promise to share my pizza, even when I'm really hungry. I promise to watch bad movies with you and pretend to like them....
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7

I promise to kill the spiders.

I promise to kill the spiders, open the tight jars, and reach the high shelves, as long as you promise to keep me warm....
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8

I promise to stop fighting over the thermostat.

I promise to stop fighting over the thermostat, or at least to only change it when you aren't looking. I promise to be your professional spider-remover for life....
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Frequently Asked Questions

If you’re unsure how to write or personalize your vows, the questions below cover the most common concerns couples have.

What are wedding vows?

Wedding vows are personal promises couples make to each other during a wedding ceremony. They express love, commitment, and intentions for marriage, and can be traditional, modern, religious, or completely personal.

How long should wedding vows be?

Most wedding vows are between 1 and 2 minutes when spoken aloud, or about 100–150 words. This length keeps vows meaningful without feeling rushed or overwhelming.

How do you start wedding vows?

Many couples begin wedding vows by addressing their partner directly, sharing a brief reflection on their relationship, or expressing gratitude before moving into promises.

Can I use AI to write wedding vows?

Yes, AI can help generate ideas, structure, or wording for wedding vows. The best approach is to personalize the result so your vows reflect your real voice and emotions.

Need help writing your own Funny vows?

Read our step-by-step guide to writing personalized vows that reflect your unique relationship and voice.

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